The Film That Haunted Me

Here be spoilers!

The Toronto International Film Festival attracts a number of different folks. There are the casual movie-goers who purchased maybe one or two tickets to films they really want to see and spend the rest of the time sight-seeing. Who can blame them? Toronto is a beautiful city. These people are the normal ones.

Then there are the journalists who cover the event. They don’t say much and usually are satisfied standing off to one side and observing the crowd. At some points, you might find someone asking questions about you, one right after the other, and you wonder why they're so inquisitive. They're probably taking down information to write in their article/blog post later.

Tread carefully when you're talking to a journalist.

<------- I took this photo

Finally, there are the avid movie-goers who will make it known that they love movies and movies are the most beautiful medium and by the way, this movie is an affront to the genre and how "Memento" is the best film that Christopher Nolan ever made. And so on and so forth.

Avoid those, they will make your head hurt.

I had an encounter with the last kind during a question and answer session for Never Let Me Go, Mark Romanek’s beautiful and solemn adaptation of the book by Kazuo Ishiguro. Both Romanek and Ishiguro were on stage, along with the screenwriter Alex Garland, actors Carey Mulligan and Andrew Garfield.

I got quite a few beautiful close-up shots of Mulligan’s dress, which looked like she had taken the universe and woven it into a garment.

During the session, a woman stood up. We assumed that she had a question for the director.
“I just want to comment on the color palette,” she said, “You used very dull, autumnal colors that I think captured the spirit of the story very well. And I just wanted to tell everyone to keep in mind to not judge the film based on the book, they were two different mediums. I just wanted to say that.”

I don’t think she took a breath.

I turned to Samantha, who specializes in television writing, and rolled my eyes.

“Was there a question here?” the proctor asked, visibly amused.

Later, James (our film writer and geek) summed it up best, “celebrities make people stupid.”

Or some people have a very strong opinion and they think other people should know. Perhaps the woman wanted to be a critic, or she enjoyed reviewing films. She was a lot more articulate about her opinions on the film than us Goldringers.

After that ended, those of us Goldringers who had gotten a ticket to the movie got up. Everyone was quiet. “That was sad,” Jes, who specializes in visual arts writing, said. “What did you think of it?”

“I need a drink,” I replied, feeling like I was weighed down with a stone in my stomach. Ever feel like you’ll never laugh again, that’s how I felt after seeing “Never Let Me Go.”
We grabbed dinner and drinks at the Hard Rock Café.

Johanna Keller, the advisor of the Goldring program, who used to write for the “New York Times” said that sometimes, writers can’t sum up their feelings about the movie through speech. “And that’s good,” she said. “Leave your opinions for the page.”

This was one of those times.

Yet I had a feeling. Sad, frightened, haunted.

Kenneth Turan, of the “Los Angeles Times,” in his review writes that the film’s images will “haunt you into the night.” That summed it up.

I was haunted even as I got back to the hotel room and it was one of those rare times where I was happy to be sharing a room with someone.

And when I sat down to write, the images played themselves in my head: the sunset at the end of the movie, the beach, the operating rooms, Keira Knightley’s prone eyes as she laid on the operating table dying while surgeons moved around, indifferent.

I don’t think I would want to see it again.

And in the crafting of my review, I tried to show the feeling of being weighed down and not being able to move or escape. Those beautiful and terrible images seemed to implant themselves in my brain and a cloud of darkness just settled. Until a couple of days later when my memory wasn't as fresh anymore.

I just realized that in all of my discussions about this film, I didn't give the plot away. It's a residual effect from my very first film review, all the way back in 2009 with Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince. I could not spoil the plot and somehow, that little habit stuck.

But for anyone who, like me, loves to be spoiled, here is a quick synopsis of Never Let Me Go:

In an alternate reality where human beings are free from disease and the life expectancy has surpassed 100, there are groups of human clones raised to be organ donors. The movie explores the lives of three clones, played by Carey Mulligan, Andrew Garfield and Keira Knightley and how they cope with relationships when their life is so short. It's science-fiction meets coming-of-age story blended into a depressing smoothie.

It's quiet and beautiful and the notion of rebellion never crosses any of the characters' minds. Perhaps that's why it's so haunting for me, because it was so true to life since, Kazuo Ishiguro said in the question & answer, "In real life, people don't rise up. Slavery was abolished not because people rose up, but because it was declared unlawful." It's so true and unpleasant and what Hollywood tends to gloss over.

I wonder if that lady who spoke up, if she wrote a review and what hers sounds like.

My official review of "Never Let Me Go."